Hello dear ones,
I always know when something in my life has come to an end, because I find myself on the outside of a door that has no handle on it.... in other words there is No Way Back. 
What do I do now, plays in my head. To add to the angst, I find myself standing on a ledge with mist around me. Not just a little bit of mist but thick mist and you don't step in any direction when you can't see your hand in front of your face.
How do I find my way from this place? I relax. I go inside. I listen and feel. I pay attention to what is around me intuitively and when something appears through the mist I feel my way into it and let my heart tell me if it is worth stepping off my ledge for.
The other way I converse with my higher self in times of confusion and crisis, is to go inwards and sit by my fire. I build a fire in a clearing by a lake or on the seashore, and sit there contemplating/reviewing previous events and letting them go. Through this process, insights come to me and I allow myself the grace and time to be in the stillness by my fire.
Before I know it I am up and walking towards my next life experience.
I recently organised a reunion with some special people whom I had shared a theatrical experience in 2001. These wonderful people hold a special place in my heart.  I have considered writing a sequel to the show we created together with the knowledge that I can't go back and recreate what we had. However, if my heart is willing I may choose to create a new and exciting project into which I can invite these amazing people and those that feel it is right for them will get on board and those that don't won't.
The thing to remember is you can't GET BACK TOGETHER. The important word there is BACK. You can REUNITE but you can't go back.
​Let's apply this to a relationship. However the relationship has ended, by death or parting of the ways, then the only way now is to go forward. If your relationship was wonderful and filled you with love then you can have that again maybe not with that person but with someone else. There is never just one person for us. If it wasn't great BACK there why would you want to return to how it was before? 
I have clients who come for coaching and insights into their often complex and challenging  lives.
Some have their Let's Live In The Past belief systems on and are most often looking at themselves as failures or at other persons faults and failings, instead of looking inside themselves and bearing witness to the glaringly obvious fact that they have changed. 
The door has shut on their old relationship/job/friendship/life in general long ago and they have been spending their precious time trying to craft a door handle so they can go back, because going forward is way to scary.
​Life is calling you into the unknown. Your inner voice is saying, 'turn around and look into the mist. You are attempting to fix what is not broken; be patient with yourself.  Stop trying to fashion a door handle out of a shoe lace and your cell phone charger, because you won't succeed. Out there in the mist is your new life. The one you detoured off from, all that time ago, so you could learn and grow from the experiences of the path you chose. Now you are at the crossroads again and again you have choices to make. Do you follow your heart, or your fears and beliefs that no longer serve you?
We applaud your choice to struggle and sweat because you believe that it builds character and makes you stronger. However prolonged periods of such activities will make you weak and frail. You will lose heart for your life, resulting in a loss of belief in the wonder of your existence. 
Turn around and look into the mist. There is a light there. It maybe small and you have to blink a few times to allow your brain to acknowledge its existence, but the more that you focus on it the brighter it will become to you.'
You can't get your life wrong. There is no wrong. There is just you and your souls journey through time and space. Stop, reflect. Keep it simple do it really well. Enjoy. Relax. Celebrate. Contemplate and most of all be kind to yourself. 
There you go. Put down your feeble escape tools and surrender to your inner peacefulness. Build a fire. Sing a song, write, draw, imagine, create, fantasise. Give your heart and soul some well needed attention.'
When there is no way back be grateful because out there in the mist is your new adventure. It's longing for you just as much as you are for it.
​Go well and go in peace.
Olwynne.

How many times have you said if I only knew then what I know now? I would do things differently. 
​Reincarnation and Karma give us the opportunity to experience multiple lifetimes, electing the life path that offers us our greatest learning experience, reincarnation being a fundamental element in our spiritual tree of life and Karma is a major supporting branch of the divine gift, of being given a second chance. Hopefully you will be given it in your present incarnation and if not you will certainly have another go at it in your next.
How does this happen? Our lives resemble fictions stories playing out in real life. They offer many genres and multiple roles to be played by us all to fulfil our Karmic quest. We are akin to actors in a play, where we act out our parts together, some are heroes and some are villains. What we don’t like to remember is that we may have been the ‘villain’ in a previous incarnation and we want to ‘do penance’ for our previous past life actions. Fortunately, the Law of Karma allows us to return in yet another life to put that right – to make a different choice – to see and experience how it feels from the other side of the action.  It doesn't always work out that way but that is how karma works.
We asked spirit to explain Karma to us in simple terms – this is their reply.
‘Karma is the means to put right what has been done wrong. To see and experience life from another point of experience, an eye for an eye but with love and divinity.  Do unto others and it shall be done unto you, except that this not the wrath of a God who deems that you need 'punishing for your sins' this happens wholly by your choice; the one you made in spirit to experience life from the other side of the coin.’

Karma is not a punishment or just about the ‘bad’ things we have done quite; it is quite the opposite. It is a divine tool that offers us the opportunity to ‘balance our books’ through learning from both sides of the experience.
Working through our Karma allows us to put to rights what we acted upon in previous lives, through the life path choice we have made and the souls we have chosen to incarnate with.
We put our hands up to take part in a lifetime where we can balance our karma.
From my experience and understanding we play out the karma with the same souls that we incarnated with who are relevant to our karmic experience.

A client of mine through the process of LightPath Journey therapy (modality I created and used for some years to help people access their soul memory), discovered that this lifetime, although not a happy one, was their conscious choice to repay a karmic debt from a previous incarnation. It has helped them begin to heal the hurt through greater understanding of what this lifetime was about and why those closest to them, have acted in the way they did towards them.
​
Karma represents the sum of our actions through all lifetimes as well as any soul contracts and intentions we have entered into that are unfulfilled. We make vows and pledges in lifetimes that may still be in play today that no longer serve us, just as we do in this lifetime.

Another of my clients made a pledge in a previous lifetime to a man with whom she had a passionate and ill-fated relationship. When the relationship ended she vowed never to love another man that way she had loved him. She was heartbroken. Her life ended sadly.
In this lifetime she met up with him again and again she fell in love. Just as in the previous lifetime the relationship was passionate, short-lived and she was left heartbroken.
She had other relationships but she couldn’t get him out of her system. She thought of him every day and dreamed of them being together. 25 years later she was still holding onto the feelings of loss of his love even though she was happily married.

Through her LightPath Journey experience she remembered the vow she had made and to her great surprise was still valid in this lifetime. Pledges and vows not revoked, still remain in place and play out from lifetime to lifetime.
She was able to revoke her pledge with love and give gratitude for the learning. Her lesson was that no one soul can be everything to us and that making such adamant vows and pledges in our human state, gives them so much power over us. I am happy to say that she has been able to let him go, and is living a full and happy life, finally unburdened by her fixation upon this man.
By clearing this Karmic lesson, she also freed the soul of the man from having to play this out with her from lifetime to lifetime. When we make a breakthrough we effectively take one for the team, not only freeing ourselves from having to play the scenario out again but also the other souls who are also involved in our Karmic lesson.
Whatever is playing out in your life, you can be sure that you were the divine creator of it all and when you finally realise this you will see yourself and your life through a new set of eyes.  Go well and be kind to yourself.

​It was February in NZ, the third trimester of summer. 
Vibrant green grass flanked by lush trees that have benefited from good rain and warm sunshine surround our home, their roots buried in the warm earth.  Birds sing incessantly to express their delight at the abundance of a bountiful summer.
Other than the native trees and shrubs, our garden consists of a few lettuces, some herbs, roses, hydrangeas, fruit trees, pots of flowering plants and most unexpectedly eight self-sown tomato plants.
Their appearance was a wonderful surprise to us, as we were discussing making a trip to the garden centre to purchase our supply for the season. However, last seasons plants left their seeds behind in the earth, giving life to eight of their progeny who have taken up residence in our plot.
They look very happy where they are clustered together as if in a family group. We didn’t have the heart to break them up and shift them around so we have left them exactly where they decided to surface.
One of the plants has established itself away from the others and we respect its right to be that plant, as there is always one that doesn’t want to fit in with the crowd.
No group would be complete without the runt of the litter whose tiny frame is diminished amongst the towering vines of its siblings.
Of course they didn't take root directly in line with the stakes we had set up from the previous year but that's ok. We decided to work with them and move the stakes to accommodate their birth place and allow them to bloom where they were planted by their parents.
Flowers have appeared on their vines which brings promise of fruit but I really don’t mind if they aren’t fruit bearing, I am just so glad to have them show up in my garden.
The presence of our little self sown tomatoes reminds me of how we like to rip out and rearrange everything so that it fits in with our idea of how it should be, in preference to allowing life to show up in its natural state and to work with what comes to pass.
Bloom where we are planted. The natural world knows how to access this phenomenon, its we humans who struggle with wanting everything our way in our time or else.
Let’s not be under any illusion that if we had not nurtured the tiny tomato plants and protected them a little, they would almost certainly not have survived the dry spell of weather in their early lives.
Unlike our little plants, perhaps you were not well protected or nurtured in your younger years either or to the contrary you had an idyllic childhood with model parents, either way both have shaped the person you are now.
All each of us need is an opportunity to nourish our soul so that we can bloom,  grow beautiful and strong too like the little tomatoes.
They are not magnificent roses or luscious orchids they are tomatoes, and tomatoes are beautiful gifts of life to us. 
From fresh juicy tomatoes we can make so many delectable dishes and in some cultures the tomato is a staple fruit that feeds families and brings bounty to the grower.
Like the humble little tomato, you are made of stardust and are as ancient as dirt. 
Never underestimate how important your life is firstly to yourself and then to the universe which you inhabit. Your seeds weren’t developed here on Earth. They were created in the cosmos along with everything that is and made manifest here as the human being your are today.
Why do we find it hard to remember our magnificently humble beginnings? I believe it is because our earthly experience dulls our true identity and we forget that we are made up a of spiritual DNA that does not die when we leave our body. Quite the contrary, it continues with us from life time to life time awaiting our attention.  Our trials and tribulations are what bring our attention to focus on the possibility that we are more than just flesh and bone. 
Norman Vincent Peale is quoted as saying, “ Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy.”
If you are anything like I was recently you may have no idea what you want to do or how to find your way forward. Desperation and despair were my constant traveling companions for months until I finally surrendered and allowed my spiritual DNA to have its way.
There are some things my spiritual DNA is designed to do and there are others that it is diametrically opposed to.  It appears I was trying to go backwards up a raging swollen fast flowing river at least that is how it felt at the time. Now when I get the jitters about truly being a living expression of my authentic self, I find I am back in the raging tide of dirty water, a place I have no wish to be, so I surrender again and remember who I am and in no time I am back on solid ground, allowing the words and ideas to flow through me and onto the page.
Last year I had a vivid dream, you know the ones your can remember every single thing that you did in them and the feeling is as real to you now as it was when you were in it. Well, mine was a flying dream. I NEVER forget my flying dreams.
I was standing on the edge of a precipice looking out over the vast terrain below and without warning I was walking back from the edge and then running at it with all my might to find myself not falling to my death, on the contrary, I was flying off towards the sun with my arms spread wide and my body stretched like a phoenix. 
After flying around for an undetermined amount of time enjoying the vista I was back on the edge of the precipice to once again run and fly off the edge taking to the air and circling the terrain below.
Again I was back on the edge only this time my brain had kicked in and instead of allowing my body to alight from the cliff top I screeched to a halt with only enough time to save myself from falling to my death. My heart was pounding out of my chest with fright as I realized that I had lost faith in my ability to fly, acquiescing to fear. Then deep disappointment took over from my fear and I stepped back again from the edge only this time to run without hesitation, launching myself off the edge with no thought for the outcome. My disgust at disappointing myself was greater than my fear of ending my life.
When love for ourselves and our dreams becomes greater than our fear of judgement or failure, then and only then will we find our wings and launch ourselves off the precipice of our life’s edge out into the glory of the lives we were born to live.
You planted yourself here however many years ago and whatever your life so far you are still here just like my tomato plants. This means that you are doing something right.
I know you have probably heard this so many times so here it is again… don’t wait to do the important things in your life.
Don’t wait until you have a new job or a partner or more money or enough money or to be skinnier or brighter or your children grow up or the planets are aligned a certain way. By constantly putting your dreams into the future you are missing out on wonderful opportunities to kick start them in the now.
It's time to see how magical this life you are living truly is. How when you take small steps towards your dream or goal, you will become the change that you have been wishing for. Every tiny step you take is a statement of commitment of your intention to bring into being something that has up until that point been only a dream or desire.
The moment you take action your intentions become manifest, your thoughts and dreams ignite and come into being.
Begin with one step whatever that may be and build on it. Love and nurture yourself as you take each step. Be your own best friend.
 My word for 2016 is Maitri a Sanskrit word translated as unconditional friendship with oneself.
I was searching for a word which would embody my intention and learning for 2016 to follow on from Authentic which was my word for 2015.
Maitri found me while I was reading a book by Pema Chodron entitled When Things Fall Apart. The title alone was enough to draw me into its pages where I discovered the word Maitri. 
The purpose is to hold the intention of the word for the year, this is not without its challenges.
I have found that it attracts opportunities to me to grow and invites change in a way I could never imagine.
Change takes place when  your desire to have something is greater than your fear of it.
This desire began within you before you came into being here and our desire to be here was greater than the sum of all possible outcomes good, bad or otherwise.
Our little tomato plants didn’t think about being judged or not being good enough or even about their survival they were just programmed to burst out of their seed pods, make a break for the light and on arrival, make the most of whatever was up there while still being tomato plants, and so did you. 
Make a break for the light and keep shining brightly.

We Are The Ones We Have Been Waiting For is the title and final line of a piece of powerful wisdom by Thomas Banyacya Sr. (1910-1999); Speaker of the Wolf, Fox and Coyote Clan Elder of the Hopi Nation. (see end of blog)
 
When I read his words I feel a resonance deep inside me as if I have been spoken to by something very ancient and powerful. The words speak to me across time and space as if I was calling to myself from all my lifetimes, to remember why I had been born, lived and died, and why I am here now.
To incarnate here is a courageous decision made and acted upon by all of us. It is one of many leaps of faith we consciously make along the path of our souls journey.
Why do we make this journey you may ask? Because we can. Because it is how we learn and grow. Each day of our lives is an act or courage and determination.
I know now that I was going to need a lot of courage to live this life I had chosen.  It would take everything I could muster to get through the early years and what got me there was my dream of a better life.

I dreamed of a time when there would be no more abuse of power over children. Where children had a voice. I dreamed of a world where abuse of children by those who had power over them was no longer acceptable and that those who chose to prey on the innocent would be brought to justice. That time has come as we witness the bringing to the light of the abuse of the children and the world is horrified and so it should be.
​
I dreamed of a time that would allow myself and other like-minded souls the freedom to embrace our spiritual beliefs without fear of death or persecution. I dreamed of a world where there was equality of opportunity for everyone. A world where we are free to express our true selves without fear of reprisal. This is a work is progress with huge inroads being made around the globe. Long may it continue.

Change is about our willingness to want a better life. A more healthy happy and spiritual life. It is being more consciousness of our intentions, how we act upon them and how that affects consciousness of all that is.
It is challenging enough to get through each day but to affect change we must step up another notch and live with passion, act with purpose and be mindful of our thoughts and feeling and conscious of our intentions before we act upon them. 
For every action there is a consequence. The intention behind that action will determine the outcome of the consequence. Some call this Karma. The law of cause and effect. But that subject is for another time. I want to leave this world a better place than I found it. For me leaving this world a better place when I depart, is not just about a clean green earth free from pollution, it is about how I lived this life and the impact my actions and intentions had on all things I come in contact with.  
I've had to do a lot of soul searching for my actions have not always been saintly. I have hurt others by my selfish fear filled ways.
 
I believe in reincarnation, that I have lived before this lifetime and that I will live beyond this one. Maybe in all our lifetimes, our desire for change caused us to act in some way that has brought about the changes in this one.  I hope so.

I want to leave behind a world where we more aware of each other. Where we take responsibility for ourselves. Where we don’t have to compete with each other for power and use our power with love as opposed to our power without love. Both are equally powerful. That to me is a sign of spiritual maturity.
I am heartened by the opening of our hearts and minds to the infinite possibilities that are available to us as we see ourselves and each other as souls on a journey together through time and space.
I am so pleased that what I could only dream of has in most part become a reality. It was all worth it. 

There is no better time or place than now to embrace our spirituality in our own unique way. There is still so much more to do.
We must seize the day. We are the idea whose time has come and we shouldn’t hold back from the pursuit of our truth… that we are spirit being human and that we have lived before in many times and places and will continue to do so.  We are our own ancestors and will become our descendants.  That no one sits in judgement of us when we die, and that our natural state is love, peace, joy and forgiveness. That was on display in abundance in the past days in my home city, Christchurch New Zealand  as we responded to the mass shootings at our local mosques. The good shone through thousands of people sharing their love and support of the Muslim families who had lost loved ones and cared for their injured.
I believe we don't have to go through anyone to find God or The Is or whatever name you may give the divine consciousness to which we all belong; we are already in direct contact with whomever we need to help us on our journey.
There are no need for trappings to express our divinity, we are all we need. Our arrival into the earth plane was humble. The only physical trapping we had was our body and we leave that behind when we depart. What we do leave is our imprint on everyone and everything we come in contact with.
 
Since we first took shape on the Earth plane, when faced with adversity and strife, we dreamed of a time when that will not be so. Acts of power without love are no longer acceptable in our family, our community, country or the world at large. If enough people become willing to be open minded and raise their awareness of themselves and others, then change will happen without violence or force.
All it takes is one person to ignite the flame and then pass it to others who have the courage to light a torch from it and pass it on to others with love, hope and faith.
It is time to stand in our power and embrace the lives we have chosen to live for We Are The Ones We Have Been Waiting for. We are the voices and hearts of those who can bring about change. It is never too late to make a difference. ©Olwynne Cade 2016
 
​Keep shining brightly.
Olwynne Cade

A Recipe for Life
The event was my youngest daughter’s 16th birthday celebrations, and I was once again challenged to find suitable food to serve to hungry teenagers.  This group is quite an eclectic mix of cultures and life choices. 
Out of respect for one group I could not serve anything with pork in it and another, nothing with meat. So I chose homemade vegetarian pizzas, which guaranteed that both preferences were honoured. Plus, homemade is so much more personal. 
To finish the meal I decided that a Pavlova with melted chocolate fudge, cream and berries would make a delicious ending to a special celebratory meal.
As I searched through my recipe books for a pavlova recipe, I looked at the well worn pages indicating the recipes that I made quite frequently; an obvious contrast to the clean neat unused pages of my books.  Some books were not used at all and yet they had adorned my shelves for years.
I stopped and pondered this enigma and thought to myself, 'why do I continue to keep recipe books that I never use?'
A reply came back to me 'because you think you may need them one day, and that day has not come yet.' 
The voice then continued, 'Perhaps it is a sign that you are stuck in your ways.  Why do you stick to the same recipes all the time when you have a library of others to choose from?'
'Convenience', my thoughts replied.  'Habit' I heard myself say.  'I can't be bothered to try any of the others because it takes effort and I don't have the time or the energy.'

I had considered for some time cooking my way through the contents of a recipe book to see what I would discover, much like the movie Julie and Julia.  That would give me a new look at food and at life too as I searched for ingredients and ways to prepare them. I could also choose to share the experience with friends as well. But it came to nothing.

After all that thinking I felt exhausted and went back to making the Pavlova. The last time I made one was...... I don't remember when.
It was messy and fun. When the ingredients had reached the stage where it needed placing on the cooking tray I sampled the sweet, sticky, white mixture. It was good enough to eat without cooking. I plastered it carefully onto the tray and then stood back with pride. Watching all those cooking programmes had been worth it, I thought to myself as I viewed my creation.
Then into the oven to slow cook on a low heat until it was ready for the next stage in its newly created life as a Pavlova.

Life is like a recipe book.  It is full of experiences waiting to happen.  Ideas burgeoning to come to life.  Some will be pleasing to the palate and others will leave a sour taste in the mouth. Unless we are prepared to cease resorting to the same old tried and tested dishes and broaden our taste buds, we will continue to eat the same fare day after day.

When we are feeling stuck it is because we are doing the same old things expecting different results.

'Insanity.....doing the same thing over and over, expecting a different result.' - Einstein
​Instead of doing the same old thing day after day, find some new life recipes and try them out. Cook up a storm, invite friends over, go on a picnic. Do whatever you have to do to taste life's culinary delights.
Go well and Bon appetite!

Belief in one’s self is paramount to manifesting what one desires. Without belief, one has nothing but doubt and fear.

Trust that you are surrounded continuously by those in spirit who want nothing more than to see you succeed and prosper on every level.
Just as an audience wants the performer to deliver an enthralling performance that allows them to feel exhilarated and enriched by their experience. They don’t want to cringe and crawl from the theatre feeling embarrassed and left wanting.
Deliver your finest work at all times.
Magic is what transforms one from average to truly splendid.
Connect to your true self - your divinity - and watch the transformation.

No-one can take your spirit/soul from you.
''No one can slight the spirit in you." Thank you Martin Dale.  They cannot diminish your true self because it is just not possible. It is only your ego self that feels harmed, diminished, wounded or affronted in some way.
You have the means and the power to manifest whatever you can imagine, so imagine away.
If you imagine doom and gloom you will get it. If you imagine greatness and prosperity you will get it. It sounds simplistic and it truly is. Trust that what you see and feel is true, in your divinity and guidance from spirit. Ask and you shall be given. Seek and you shall find.
Your knowing of your divinity has been strongly tempered in order to constitute your survival but you no longer need to do that. Be brave and bold enough to stand in your full power at all times.
Test your manifestational power. Focus your thoughts and imaging on something simple and allow it to come to you.
Call us in to assist and then let it be so. You will be astounded by the results.
It is only your dullness of spirit and your unwillingness to shine brightly that keeps you from your true life path. Your fear of being great and how that will somehow bring about negative forces is what holds you in a state of suspension.
How to use the full power of your being is what you need to learn. Now is the time to start.
Invoke the powers that be, to bring to you that which you need and desire. Then stand back and watch the heavens move to make it happen before your very eyes.

Open your mind and your energy centers.  Work daily by cleaning, clearing, healing and meditating on your energy centers.  Imagine yourself a vessel and see it being filled to overflowing with beautiful celestial light from the heavens.  Imagine yourself as a light being, glowing and moving through your world. Everything you touch is healed and filled with light.

Every word you utter brings about an opening of the consciousness in those who hear it.

You can still the ocean or stop a moving vehicle with one thought. These things have been done and are being done daily so they are completely possible.

Now imagine yourself having that kind of power. How would you use it?

Close your eyes and imagine a waterfall of heavenly light pouring down into your head. See it go all the way down into your body, to the tips of your toes.  See your body begin to fill with this light, like a cup or a vessel. Feel it coming up your body, right up to your head until it flows over and down the outside of you, covering and surrounding you and into your auric field.

In this light is everything that you can, will and need to be.

Feel the love and the endlessness of your being. You are now completely connected to every resource you could possibly imagine and those that you have no concept of.

Ask this heavenly divine light to bring to you what you truly need and desire and it is with you now.

Your cup runneth over.

It is your limitations that hold you in a state of poverty and victim-hood.  When you live with your limitations, which have been placed upon you by others who also live in this state, then you have no choice but to bring forward the ego self who will argue for your limitations and feel the need to compete and fight for your survival.

Your divine self knows no limitations. It lives in complete boundlessness and abundance.  It needs nothing from any other person or soul, because it knows that it has access to everything itself.

And that cannot be taken away by another for their own aggrandizement.

But first you must have belief in a higher power. You must truly believe. Without faith and belief, you will always only pretend and never truly commit to the practice; by letting go and allowing yourself the greatness of feeling, your spirit will fill you with healing light and joy.

You cannot have the full bounty of your being until you give yourself over to the light and allow it to consume your every living fibre, cell, thought and feeling.

It requires no less than complete surrender of the ego and total commitment to your souls purpose.

May you always shine brightly.
Olwynne.

It's official!

After 55 years of telling people that I am not Welsh, in reply to their query about the origins of my name - Olwynne, I can now say, with great pride - Yes! I am Welsh.
So how did this come about and how did I not know this important piece of information for 55 years? All I can say to that is life is a journey of unfolding mysteries.
Like all good journeys there are many paths that were travelled to reach this point, with twists and turns along the way.
Let me explain....
Throughout this lifetime I have felt different - I didn't fit in with the norm.
One of my many conscious thoughts about not fitting in, was that I had a funny name, which people couldn't and in some cases still can't, pronounce and spell.
Not only was it a difficult name to spell but to add to the challenge, my mother added an extra 'n' and 'e' just for good measure.
Until adulthood I never found another living soul who had the name Olwynne.
To add to my confusion people would ask with regular monotony was I 'Welsh'? I would reply that I had no Welsh heritage; my mother just liked the name.

As the years went by I found that I had a fondness for Wales and loved to hear the Welsh accent. Until my recent discovery I wondered whether I might have been trying to associate it with my name's origin, and was satisfied at some level by that possibility.

The next layer of this journey is set back in the time of King Arthur and the isle of Avalon times. 
Arthur, Merlin, Guenevere, Vivian, Avalon and Wales have held my fascination for years.  I even played Guenevere in the musical 'Camelot' in 1983.

The legends of Merlin, Arthur, the priestesses and druids are a great passion and interest of mine. In fact, I have been writing a book since 1990 which is set in that time. 

Until 10 days ago I had become stuck as to the setting of my story, trying for years to place it in Britain in and around Glastonbury, which is said to be the seat of Avalon. 

In the true nature of synchronicity, a future monarch of Great Britain and Wales was to play his part in my discovery, when in 2010 Prince William of Wales took a position with RAF Search & Rescue based in Anglesey, Wales.

I don't remember how his appointment came to my attention, I just know that from that moment on, whenever I heard the name Anglesey, it would light up my mind; a warmth and excitement would come over me. I went to Google Maps and looked it up to discover, it was a large island off the west coast of Wales. Seeing the island felt familiar, as if I already knew where and what it was and was just remembering it again after a long absence. I felt quite emotional about discovering Anglesey's presence. How had I not known about it all these years I asked myself?
Well now I did. The question that permeated my discovery was, "why did I feel so strongly about this Welsh island?"

To add to the mystery, every time I thought about Anglesey I heard the words in my mind - The Holy Isle.  On hearing these words my heart would expand, bringing a warmth and excitement with it. The Holy Isle - Avalon?  Merlin?  Ambrosius? Arthur?  Their names seemed to come with the words, but there was more to it as well. Another layer that I just couldn't access; a missing piece to the puzzle.

I love reading and have devoured many books throughout my life. I don't just read any old thing, instead books seem to come to my attention and in the past months I have been experiencing a drought in this area. I wasn't concerned by the absence of reading material as I have been occupied by so much else; my work as a teacher, guide and therapist in the reincarnation, Conscious Living field.

But things were about to change...
During the Xmas break of 2013 I started to read Reincarnation by Ron Stedman
and while research these leads on the internet prompted by the book landed on a site which talked of 'The Druids of Anglesey and The Isle of Man'.  There it was again!

I felt as if another piece of the puzzle had fallen into place. Having read much about the Druids, I had not found them associated with Angelsey before. While perusing the information I received a call from my sister Barbara.  We talked about many things until somehow the conversation made its way to our great grandmother. Barbara said, "Our great grandmother came from Wales." I was stunned. Immediately I thought, 'she came from Anglesey', but I didn't voice it at the time.

Barbie sent me an email with the info and sure enough, our maternal great grandmother came from Anglesey, Wales.  Not only did she come from Anglesey, she was born in Holyhead, which in an island, a Channels breadth off the island of Anglesey and is known as the Holy Island.  My heart sang.  The pieces were falling into place.  I felt hugely excited, overwhelmed with joy, and finally whole. I had made sense out of so many of my thoughts and feelings throughout my life. 

As well as my Welsh roots, I am also Irish, English and Scottish and a mix of wherever these lines of lineage are derived from and let’s not forget that I am a New Zealander and extremely proud of that.

As for the connection to Arthurian times, it was as if I could see them all, ancestors, myth and legend along with my great grandmother, all standing in front of me saying - "Well there you go then. You have finally found your way here. Welcome home."

Now to Mr Cleese...

John Cleese, Garry and Camilla on stage in NZ - image from John Cleese Shot of NZ.  

In December 2005 John Cleese toured New Zealand with his production, 'John Cleese — His Life, Times and Current Medical Problems'.

I had been working as a crew member for professional theatrical touring companies and had recently worked as a dresser on the touring play, 'Then Comes Love', starring Zoe Lucker and Shane Cortese.  The Stage Manager must have liked my work as he recommended me to work in wardrobe with the John Cleese show on the Christchurch leg of the tour.

I rocked up to the Isaac Theatre Royal with excitement and anticipation expecting to meet up with the head of wardrobe only to find that there was no such person. In fact that person was me.  That's when the nerves really set in.  I was ushered into a large dressing room which was full of boxes, trunks and bags etc. and as I always do, I pulled up my sleeves and just got on with it.

A couple of hours later I was ironing this large Ralph Lauren shirt, the property of Mr Cleese, and was interrupted by a voice that we all know so well.

"Hello. Who are you?"

I took a deep breath, checked that my chin was not hanging embarrassingly on my chest and looked up to see the man himself standing to my left, a kind but quizzical look  on his face. 

"I am Olwynne", I replied, "Your wardrobe mistress."

He then said what so many others had said throughout my life - "Olwynne? You are not welsh are you?"

To which I replied as always - "No. I am not."

He then stated with great emphasis - "Good. My parents hated the Welsh."

I would expect no less from this a man.

Well Mr Cleese... I hope you get to read this someday.... I am at last Welsh and very, very proud of it!